Nooooot Me

Be amazed at the things the world has never seen!!! As Patrick tries to be himself again...

I've been reading my past posts and I thought... damn they're horrible... (Watch me crap my pants while laughing!!)

Recently I've been writing on notebooks (paper seems more coherent to poetry... yes poetry, shut your mouths.) and I've been seriously contemplating whether or not I should post them.

But back to the subject of my former posts, I never realized that my writing has changed so much in the past years that I find myself amazed. No longer trying to be quirky and funny are the things that emerge from the tips of my fingers, but replaced with anger and frustration (hence the lacking of post). Things must be changed!

Isn't it amazing that when you look back at yourself you find the old you is better in a lot of ways? You find yourself older and a lot more serious about things, thinking of the future more and finding your meaning of existence, bull crap... I guess swimming in the benevolent pool of crap that we call the world does that to you.

So I'm making a choice. I am sticking to who and what I am because I like me. Not in love with me but a serious like. Not avoiding change but maintain myself as I see me, a growth of personality rather than a self flagellation for a sudden rebirth into a new being. A betterment of what is me rather than evolving into something else. Than again this could all be anal excrements, I could just be convincing myself that this is better, but I'll try.